Mass media musings and pop culture nonsense filtered through the brainpan of yours truly, with a special focus on the line of dialogue most used in film!
Ah! Some blissfully awful 80's cheese here - this is Cannon's answer to Indiana Jones - which they didn't get out until after Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. The high quality of the movie extends all the way to the poster - look how everyone on it looks like themselves - except for poor ol' Sharon Stone...
Old Dracula (American International, 1975)
Filmed in England as Vampira the previous year, this rather tepid comedy was grabbed up by AIP and had this title slapped on to make North American audiences think it might be a sequel to Young Frankenstein. I don't think it did all that well, which is why 1975's Legend of the Werewolf was not brought over in 1976 and given the title "Middle Aged Wolfman."
Glen or Glenda? (Screen Classics II, 1953)
Ed Wood's heartfelt expose of life as a transvestite has been perceived as a "so bad it's good" masterpiece for decades. And it can certainly still be enjoyed that way. But more and more people reviewing this movie are finding that maybe, just maybe, Ed knew a little more about what he was doing than people have given him credit for. To these reviewers, Ed's use of stock footage and symbolism, and his casting of Bela Lugosi as a representation of some higher power are actually positives and the movie can be seen as having many deep layers worthy of study. Regardless of which way you think of this movie, I think we can all agree on one thing:
Ed Wood made a spectacularly unattractive woman.
Sorry, Ed.
Until next time we meet, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here.
Oh sure, we love Lon Chaney Jr. as Larry Talbot, but Universal had a werewolf before they had a Wolfman. This one is more than 75 years old - so it's a bit creaky, and legend has it Hull was not a particularly patient man in makeup man Jack Pierce's chair, so his wolf form is a little less hairy than you might expect - in fact, since neither the trailer or the poster show him - let's throw in a bonus photo of Hull in werewolf form:
Still a cool looking werewolf...
- but there are some great moments scattered across the movie, and it is well worth a watch. I have it in a swell Wolfman DVD box set from Universal - so it could be humming in the player in moments, should you care to come over and watch it with me - even tonight!
Until next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
Hey, it's been a while since we've trekked to Mora Tau - that's kind of strange. In fact, it's downright WEIRD!
Back in the day when TNT was a much more interesting cable channel than it is now - which seems to be a couple of new series, lots of old series, and a constant stream of bad Robin Williams movies - TNT had some really fun and wild stuff on - like this goofy header to their Friday All Night movie show - which featured all kinds of stuff in the Turner vaults - from old horror movies to Godzilla; from 60's Italian sci-fi oddities to Hammer films. I caught some stuff taping these late night flicks - airing in the 3 am or later timeslot - that I've not seen before or since.
I miss 100% Weird, as it really gave this then relatively new cable channel some real character. Let's take a look at some more strange video clips from this series. I don't know what all we might see - but I do know one thing: it will be completely, totally 100% Weird.
No, I'm not sure what that movie clip is from. I hope I find out one day.
When the movies would go to commercial, sometimes coming back there would be a quick bit to let you know that this movie was indeed, 100% Weird. Here are several of those little animated bumpers.
Here's a promo for the very first show!
The other great TNT show was Monstervision - which was often hosted by the great Joe Bob Briggs. Here, let's have the man himself explain the whole thing...
And here's a great montage promo from that show.
These are all short clips, so I'll stick a few more in - I think we're still under 5 minutes total running time... Monstervision showed a lot of Godzilla movies - here's another great promo:
And to close this out - we'll go with the very last host segment from the very last Joe Bob hosted Monstervision...the movie was Children of the Corn II: The Final Sacrifice....
TNT sure was a lot more fun in the 90's! Until next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
"So much of life, it seems to me, is determined by pure randomness." - Sidney Poitier
Just like this week's movie posters!
The Kindred (Synapse Films, 1987)
I saw this one in the theater 25 years ago - not a terrible movie, kind of blah. Monsters, blood, and lots of goo, with Rod Steiger entering his latter day horror period and chewing the scenery in a very identifiable toupee.
Vanishing Point (20th Century Fox, 1971)
This is a very cool early 70's car movie with an intriguing cast, and a wild plot - a guy named Kowalski is hired to drive a car from Denver Colorado to San Francisco California - and he decides to do it in a nearly impossible time. His full bore blast down the highway brings The Man down on him - first because he's speeding, and eventually because he's there. Existentialism joins Kowalski riding shotgun, and the movie becomes a cult classic.
I saw this one at the tender age of 4 at the drive-in with my parents. Despite that "GP" rating, the movie did feature a nude woman walking around in the desert - and I remember a hushed conversation going on in the front seat about whether or not to try to cover my eyes in the back seat. While that went on, I experienced my first movie nudity - and I still remember the scene all these years later. *sigh* Ah, memories.
It Came From Beneath the Sea (Columbia Pictures, 1955)
An early Ray Harryhausen classic, this one pits the city of San Francisco against a giant octopus. Well, really, I should say quintopus, as the effects budget would only allow Ray to animate five tentacles on the beastie. But you've got Kenneth Tobey and Faith Domergue chasing the critter around in a submarine, with plenty of that fondly remembered (read: cheesy and embarrassing) mid 50's sexism thrown in as a bonus. But it is good fun, and highly recommended.
Until next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
Tom Cruise (Losin' It!) Jeremy Renner (Thor) Simon Pegg (Shaun of the Dead) Paula Patton (Precious) Michael Nyqvist (The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo '09) Vladimir Mashkov (Behind Enemy Lines) Samuli Edelmann (Rock 'n Roll Never Dies) Ivan Shvedoff (Enemy at the Gates) Josh Holloway (TV's Lost) Anil Kapoor (Slumdog Millionaire) Léa Seydoux (Inglorious Basterds) Pavel Kríz (Sleeping Dogs) Ilia Volok (Jackie Chan's First Strike) and Tom Wilkinson (Rush Hour) as The Secretary
And look fast for:
Andreas Wisniewski (The Living Daylights)
Behind the Camera:
Directed by Brad Bird
Produced by J.J. Abrams, Tom Cruise, and 9 other assorted Producers, Co-Producers, Associate Producers, and Executive Producers
Written by Josh Applebaum and Andre Nemec
Mission: Impossible TV series created by Bruce Geller
It's been a few years since we last saw the Impossible Missions Force and their leader Ethan Hunt (Cruise). Apparently Hunt's life has taken a downturn as we find him in the film's opening scenes serving time in a Russian prison. Luckily, an IMF team consisting of Agent Carter (Patton) and our old pal Benji (Pegg) - recently graduated to field agent - is already underneath the prison and on the way in, and soon Hunt is out. Well, out of prison, but not Russia, as his mission, should he choose to accept it, is to infiltrate the Kremlin with his new team to find the identity of a nuclear terrorist codenamed Cobalt. He does accept the mission, but there are... complications. Really bad complications, and soon the team - joined by a mysterious intelligence analyst named Brant (Renner) - find themselves in the ultimate disavowal: Ghost Protocol. With no support, and only one small cache of the IMF's trademarked Gee-Whiz™ technology, will the team find this mission just too impossible?
"I thought you were here to Renner assistance."
"Well, according to you we were supposed to just Cruise through this."
"I suppose she's going to want a Patton the back for her part."
"And he definitely needs to be taken down a Pegg."
I have been a fan of the late great Bruce Geller's TV series since catching it in reruns on the original live TV incarnation of the F/X cable network in the 90's. I timer taped two episodes a day on VHS for about 6 months and managed to see every episode. I have since purchased every TV season set on DVD, and I'm about to add the two seasons of the 80's TV revival to the video vault. I have seen the previous three theatrical films as well, enjoying all to some degree. I say all that to establish my credentials as a true fan of the franchise. Now I have seen the fourth Mission: Impossible movie and I have this to say:
Bruce Geller is smiling down from the afterlife.
This fourth outing turns out to be the best of the movies yet - and the reason is simple: it does more to evoke the original series than any of the previous entries. The first movie was doing well until it decided to take a beloved original character and have them turn traitor (I still have a dream where they do a sequence in one of these movies where it turns out the traitor was really an impostor in one of those nifty masks - and they rescue the real character - held in captivity since before the first movie started)
But I digress.
The second entry in the series was a ballet of kinetic action courtesy director John Woo but the least like the original show. The third flick started back in the right direction, putting the team up against a great bad guy but still relying a little too much on double/triple/quadruple/wait who am I working for? agent stuff. This one pegs it (or is that Peggs it?) early on, with an opening sequence that culminates in the actual lighting of a fuse - which then burns its way through the film's credits - and a montage sequence of quick cuts from the movie we're watching - which is exactly what the original series did every episode for seven seasons: a montage of shots from the episode you're about to see. That's something that would never be done today - hell, even the 80's Mission: Impossible just went with the same standard set of shots showing off the team for every episodes of those two seasons. I don't usually put video clips in my reviews - but let's take a look at two M:I series episode openings - to show off the cool montages.
First, here's a credit sequence from season two - with what many consider the "dream team" of IMF agents:
And here is one from season five, with a jazzy new version of the theme and some new cast members:
The first movie did put some movie clips over the opening credits, admittedly, but the shots are so fast it's hard to make out what you're seeing for the most part. M:I2 and M:I3 completely skipped the idea, so it made a most welcome return in Ghost Protocol. In fact, it made this series fan giggle like a schoolgirl, and set the whole movie off on the right foot. Continuing the nods to the series, just a couple of minutes later there was some incidental music during the mission acceptance scene that was straight out of the series, which again had me grinning like an idiot.
But lest you believe the whole movie is just a love letter to the 1960's version - oh no - this is a terrifically entertaining action thriller in its own right - with a solid cast led by Cruise taking us through several amazing suspense and action setpieces. I don't want to spoil any of them, so I'm not going into much more detail about them - but director Brad Bird (The Incredibles) shows he can handle live actors as well as he can computer pixels, keeping the movie on the front burner and boiling all the way through.
I've heard Tom Cruise is in this picture.
Pretty much every aspect of the movie hits on all cylinders. The plot is full of obstacles and twists, but never becomes too complicated or confusing. The stunts are beautifully handled - with Tom Cruise seemingly right in the thick of things throughout, which is very cool, especially as he's almost fifty years old now! The cast is spiffy, with the standouts Pegg - who provides just the right amount of comic relief while still coming off as a valid member of a spy team - and Nyqvist, absolutely hissable as the main bad guy. I must also give shouts out to Josh Holloway, with an impressive Big Screen presence in a smallish role as an IMF agent; and the quick appearance of Andreas Wisniewski - a Bond villain henchman from The Living Daylights who strangled people with his walkman headphones; and the terrorist from the original Die Hard with feet smaller than Bruce Willis's sister. My only quibble is that there's almost no mask work in the movie. But there are disguises, so that is a quibble.
This is by far my favorite action movie of 2011, even if I did see it in 2012 - and that puts it out of competition with Skyfall too...heh heh. If you've enjoyed any of the previous M:I movies there's no reason to believe you wouldn't have a good time here; and if you like action movies and thrillers but have skipped these - I still highly recommend this as solid escapist entertainment. Your mission, should you choose to accept it - is to check this one out!
"Remember...blue is like glue. Red? You're dead."
Let's Get Out of Here ?
I can't be entirely sure - but I thought I heard it in Russian as everybody was leaving the Kremlin in such a hurry. More research is required.
Eye Candy ?
Paula Patton is a most fetching IMF member - so she's in!
Her mission, which she's already accepted - is to make my eyes happy. Mission: Accomplished!
Buddha Man's Capsule Review
Buddha Man says: "Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol is
the rare fourth movie in a series that actually improves on
its predecessors, taking the top spot!"
Right you are, Buddha me lad! This review will self destruct in five seconds. Until it does, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
I have come to the conclusion that Guich Koock would, so we're picking this one:
A movie I fell in love with when I first saw it in 1980 or thereabouts on Showtime. It had fallen off my radar in the years since, but came back into my life recently courtesy a copy of a VHS release as a part of the Sybil Danning's Adventure Video series - and this movie has not lost one iota of its appeal in the intervening years! Andy Sidaris knocks this one out of the park, with enough wild action and gratuitous nudity to satisfy any discerning viewer.
I truly adore this movie, and will watch it anytime with anyone - even tonight! Should you care to come by, that is!
Until next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
Monsoon (aka Isle of Forgotten Sins) (Producers Releasing Corporation, 1943)
Before the Camera:
John Carradine (House of Frankenstein)
Gale Sondergaard (Sherlock Holmes and the Spider Woman)
Sidney Toler (Charlie Chan in the Secret Service)
Frank Fenton (A Scream in the Dark)
Rita Quigley (Riot Squad)
Rick Vallin (Ghosts on the Loose)
Tala Birell (Bringing Up Baby)
Patti McCarty (Bluebeard '44)
Betty Amann (Nancy Drew...Reporter)
William Edmunds (House of Frankenstein)
and
Veda Ann Borg (The Falcon in Hollywood)
as
Luana
Behind the Camera:
Directed by Edgar G. Ullmer
Produced by Peter R Van Duinen
Written by Edgar G. Ulmer and Raymond L. Shrock
This microbudget programmer gives us John Carradine as a two fisted, bar fightin’ gold huntin’ skirt chasin’ tough guy named Mike Clancy hanging around the South Seas with his best frenemy Jack Burke (Fenton) and gal pal Marge (Sondergaard). For the first chunk of the 80 minute run time, not a lot happens; Carradine and Fenton fight, Sondergaard schemes, a gaggle of girls in sarongs hang around and hint that Marge might be running a brothel in the back of her bar; and these same girls periodically threaten to break into song.
Sidney Toler was so happy to be
using prepositions again...
Then Sidney Toler pops up as some guy named Krogan looking like a more smiley Charlie Chan in a boat captain’s hat, and he brings along the movie’s plot – he lets it be known he’s got a pile of stolen gold hidden away and nobody but nobody is taking that gold away from him. This immediately sets the boys to fighting again as each plots his own plan to steal that stolen gold. And since they just happen to be master divers, it’s a lucky thing that gold is hidden in the deep waters out by Toler’s hideout. Eventually Clancy and Burke team up, though none too happily, and things take a turn for the skullduggerous when the stolen gold turns out to be a trap – seems Toler wants the boys out of the way before they really do come after his thieved hoard. Eventually, the title winds come a blowin’ for a disaster movie climax, albeit on a budget that wouldn’t have dry cleaned Irwin Allen’s ties 30 years later…
Gale Sondergaard likes the cut of John Carradine's jib...
Even though it’s a studiobound B picture, this turned out to be quite a bit of fun, and for a variety of reasons. The cast sets it off well, with old pros Carradine, Toler and Sondergaard adding immeasurable value; but it’s also the fact that despite a tiny budget, the filmmakers went on and told the story they wanted to tell, resorting to miniature sets and special effects to fill in the sequences that would have cost a pretty penny if filmed full scale.
I'd have said they used a GI Joe here,
but it's twenty years too early!
However, this just makes the movie all the more charming and fun to me – from the aerial shots of the bar on the water’s edge, through the underwater diving scenes done with miniature animatronic figures (a film first?) straight through to the monsoon-erific end sequence. There’s also a couple of great fights, and it’s fun to watch Carradine and Fenton start at each other, then with a cut to a wider shot their stunt doubles take over, impressively trashing the sets as they knock each other about. All in all, I would probably have found about ten minutes to shave from somewhere, just to bring that 80 down to 70 and really make this thing hum. Other than that, I had a good time with this one, and if you give it a chance, you might too!
Let's Get Out of Here ?
At roughly 13:15, Frank Fenton throws a camoflaging "you and I" in between Let's and Get while trying to find accompaniment in vacating the premises.
Eye Candy ?
That's a sarong? No, that's a so right, you ask me!
You know what, for looking 40's hot in sarongs; for managing to sneak around the Hayes code playing almostitutes, and so I don't have to figure out which actress is which - the entire female cast is in! Welcome to the list, ladies!
Buddha Man's Capsule Review
Buddha Man says "Monsoon may be too low budget to
completely blow you away, but it'll give a good dousing
of entertainment to those so inclined."
You tell 'em, Buddha buddy! And until next we meet, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
Hey, this department's a year old with this post! Huzzah!
Let's jump on the Bond Wagon this time out - but let's look at foreign 007 posters - starting with Doctor No!
Italian!
Japanese!
Spanish!
All of these posters are very cool, with much to recommend on each - I like the full figures and simplicity of the Italian poster; the wild energy of the Japanese poster; and the capture of the exquisite beauty of the ladies on the Spanish poster - along with the little skulls in the "00".
If you have a copy of one these laying around you're not using...I'd be happy to give it (or them) a good home!
Until next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
No, it was this blog! Let's Get Out of Here! There's an interview and everything! You can check the actual post outhere.
But don't let that post be your only visit over there - all of the Horror Film Diary is a lot of fun and you should jump around over there and read a lot! Then come back. Often.
I am deeply honored to have been chosen, and want to thank Maynard and all of his readers!
Over there at MM'sHFD, Maynard has stated what his favorite horror films are - in fact, they're on a list on the left side of every post - and we're going with his #3 horror movie for this Saturday Night at the Movies!
I saw this at the Varsity Theater in Carbondale Illinois in 1982, which had recently expanded into a three screen theater from two. My parents started out in one of the other two auditoriums watching Megaforce, but when the Cheese Quotient went past my Dad's tolerance, they switched over to theater three, as my choice for the evening - John Carpenter's brilliant remake of the 1951 classic - would not have appealed to my Pop either. So, they ended up seeing the second half of E.T.
I tell that slightly digressive tale because it's pretty wild that there were three science fiction flicks playing in that theater that week. And two of them were about aliens coming to Earth, though each had far different agendas in mind.
I was completely knocked out by the movie, still one of Carpenter's best in my opinion. Great actors, terrific suspense, and the most incredible physical makeup effects ever achieved in more than a century of cinema. Rob Bottin is a genius, and deserved two Oscars for this movie's squishy visuals.
If Maynard wasn't all the way over in Austria - not Australia, think Danube - I'd invite him over tonight to watch this with me on Blu-Ray. In fact, anyone who wants to drop by is invited. Just give me a heads up so I can lay in enough popcorn!
Until next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
Look at that - another post celebrating Friday the 13th, and the exquisite wines to be found at CrystalLakeWines.com...
2012 is going to have three Friday the 13ths in it, and the first one is here!
This first one is taking place at the same time that Adrienne King is in Los Angeles for a 35mm screening of the original 1980 movie to celebrate a limited edition CD release of Harry Manfredini's music from the first six flicks!
Consequently, I'm not sure if Adrienne King will be presiding over a big Coast to Coast Toast segment there at the show - but in the hopes that others will be participating somewhere in the world - I went ahead and cobbled together a new photo in case there's a contest again:
I call this one "All Out of Crystal Lake Wine" and as can be seen, Alice is equally unhappy about the situation.
Wish me luck should there be another judging competition - I'm not sure if winning last year's precludes me from winning this year's, but I wanted to participate in any case.
Ki-Ki-Ki-Ma-Ma-Ma!
Until next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
Due to an incredibly busy year - including filming at least one movie; taking an international cruise with her family; appearing at some Friday the 13th events across the country; and attending her first gallery art show in England - LGOOH Official 2011 Blog Celebrity Adrienne King was a little delayed in getting the prize out, but we stayed in contact throughout the year.
A little before Christmas - while I sat in my quiet house late one evening, blogging away, my cell phone rang - and I was totally surprised - it was Adrienne King calling! Again! (I really can't describe the thrill this horror movie fan gets when the star of one of his very favorite horror movies just ups and calls out of the blue. A-maz-ing!)
We caught up a bit, and Adrienne was very apologetic on taking so long to get the prize package out to us. I told her not to worry about it - as the woman is a human dynamo, constantly on the go. But she assured me it would be here by Christmas - and it was.
WOW!
And DOUBLE WOW!
The poster was even more beautiful than I expected - and it came with two more bottles of that delicious Crystal Lake Wine - have I mentioned that you can get yours at CrystalLakesWines.com?
It took me a couple of weeks winding down from the holidays to get the poster framed - but it is now, and it occupies a great spot in the house - check this out!
And check out that bottle on the left - Adrienne signed it "Let's Get Out of Here!" How awesome is that?
Here's a closeup on the gorgeous print:
If you don't know the story of this print - I'll let Adrienne herself tell you - she found a box of Friday the 13th memorabilia she'd forgotten she had several years after the movie wrapped...and...
"inside my jeans pocket were Sean Cunningham’s original hand-written notes (coffee stains & all) from the night we shot the infamous fight scene on the beach which concludes with Mrs. V’s decapitation! What an incredible find!! I remember Sean tossing the notes into the trash as the sun was dawning & my grabbing them out! I think it was just to prove to myself what we’d all gone through (it was an intense all-nighter) because at that point we didn’t even know if we were going to have enough money to finish the movie. You have to remember, the first F13 was an independent. So I designed a poster for Sean & myself which I called the “Ballet of the Machete”. Sean thought it was the coolest thing especially when you see how many numbered notes he wrote : “13”!!!! … a total fluke! It’s the only piece of Friday the 13th art that Sean has hanging in his home or office.
It was at this time that we realized the fans would appreciate this as well & could follow along as the director & Tom Savini actually visualized & shot the scene that very night under the full moon at Camp Crystal Lake. I also made it a limited edition of 1300; signed & numbered & stamped with my art stamp on the back of the poster so that it’s something a little more special & collectible."
That's the lady's words straight from AdrienneKing.com, by the way.
My print is number 813 - I am so thrilled that I got one of the "13" prints!
Adrienne King truly rocks!
Until next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
Dracula '73 (aka Dracula A.D. 1972) (Hammer Films, 1972)
This is actually a foreign poster for the movie Dracula A.D. 1972, which didn't get released in France or Spain until the following year, hence the update - so it stayed modern! Regardless, it's a great poster! I like the movie too!
The Incredible Petrified World (Governor Films, 1957)
No one seems to like this goofy lost world adventure - but it's got John Carradine, TV's first Lois Lane, and the Hideous Sun Demon himself - Bob Clarke - in it - and I think it might be Jerry Warren's best movie. Of course, that's a pretty short yardstick to measure a movie by, but I've seen Teenage Zombies and Frankenstein Island, so I think I'm safe in saying it.
The Beach Girls (Crown International, 1982)
Ah, an early 80's cable favorite - I may or may not have seen it back in the day - but I own it now on DVD - so a'watchin' it I will be sometime soon.
Until next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
As I've suddenly realized this is the 50th anniversary year for 007 in the cinema, I think Jack Lord could, so that means we're going to get into some Bondage!
There are a couple of choices for trailers for this movie - I like this one because of the narrator...
And because we're celebrating a semi-centennial - let's take a look at the American and British posters. British movie posters are called quads, and they look like the American style turned on its side.
Here's the American poster:
And here's the British quad:
It's the first James Bond feature film - I saw it on ABC TV in the 80's for the first time, well into watching the series. At first, as a teen, it wasn't one of my faves, but now I like it a lot.
It resides in the video vault on VHS, DVD, and on Blu-Ray. The restoration work done for the hi-def releases is startling. If you've only ever seen this on television or videotape, I heartily recommend a Blu-Ray viewing on a nice big TV - like mine - and you could pop by tonight, even!
Until next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
We'll kick off the new year at Let's Get Out of Here with a trip to the Video Vault of Mora Tau and some prime 007 video! But you know what? We won't use one frame from the official movie series!
Here's the opening "credits" to the James Bond video game Everything or Nothing. It features a song by Mya that to me at least rivals - if not bests - Madonna's Die Another Day and Alica Keys and Jack White's Another Way to Die. And check out the cast used in the game!
Let's keep to our Pierce Brosnan motif for clip #2; a Visa commercial with a good sense of 007 about it...
And let's step out for some spooferific fun with you know who and his theme song to the Leslie Nielsen flick Spy Hard:
And with that 2012 is off and running! Huzzah! Until next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!
