Remember when that giant fast food corporation tried to buy the entire sport of golf?

The McMasters  (Chevron Pictures, 1970)

Before the Camera:

Brock Peters  (To Kill a Mockingbird)
Burl Ives  (Uphill All the Way)
Jack Palance  (Companeros)
David Carradine  (Death Race 2000)
Nancy Kwan  (Supercock)
LQ Jones (The Beast Within)
RG Armstrong  (The Beast Within)
Alan Vint  (The Lady in Red)
John Carradine (House of Frankenstein)
and
Dane Clark  (Paid to Kill)


Behind the Camera:

Directed by Alf Kjellin

Produced by Dimitri De Grunwald and David Sachson

Written by Harold Jacob Smith


The late 60's and early 70's were a very interesting time in the world of cinema. After decades of being scrunched up by the very restrictive Hayes Code, the Movies had finally kicked that archaic nonsense to the curb. The Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) was in its infancy. (Well, actually, the Hayes Code had been renamed the MPAA in the mid 40's, but it was the same old medieval puritanism until the mid 60's.) There was a vacancy in the top position there in 1963, and it sat empty for three years. Then Jack Valenti came along and revamped the whole magilla. Now, this isn't a debate on the pros and cons of Jack Valenti and the MPAA that he created and presided over for decades. But regardless of how you feel about Jack, after the Hayes Code was terminated with extreme prejudice, married couples could sleep in the same bed on screen, dying could be done with the eyes open, and endings no longer had to be happy.
    With all that under our belts, now we can turn to The McMasters. Benjamin (Peters), a former slave, returns from fighting in the Civil War to the only place he's known outside of the war: the ranch of his former master, Neal McMasters (Ives). Benji passes through town on the way there, and it becomes readily obvious that despite the war ending and slavery being abolished, he is not going to be readily accepted by most of the townspeople. It doesn't help that Benjamin chooses to make the journey wearing his Union uniform. And it isn't surprising that the one person in town most upset by this is Kolby (Palance), who coincidentally hangs around town with one arm and his Confederate uniform on.
    Trouble is going to ensue.
    Neal offers Benji half of his spread, and his last name. For a moment, it seems like the men are getting married - and it's a long moment. After a while the relationship settles back to a father-and-son dynamic, but it leaves one to wonder if the other idea was really there? Benji tries to become friends with the local Native American tribe - including White Feather (Carradine) and his sister Robin (Kwan); the Native Americans are wary, tired of being accused of being cattle thieves and treated like trash by the townspeople. That they are cattle thieves shows the shades of gray nearly all the characters have in this movie: Benji eventually starts shmoozing romantically with Robin, but unused to tenderness and kindness he lashes out and abuses her physically, mentally, and emotionally. He comes to realize what he's done and makes amends; but movie heroes didn't do things like that in the decade previous.
    Eventually Kolby's hatred sparks some of the locals into an act of repellent violence against Benji and Robin, and the three factions (the ranchers, the townspeople, and the Native Americans) face off in a deadly climactic showdown.

"I think I can calm 'em down with a little 'Holly Jolly Christmas'."

This movie always interested me after I read its capsule entry in Leonard Maltin's TV Movies book. In it, he indicates that this movie has two running times, due to there being two different endings filmed. Major spoiler here - he says in one ending Palance and his men win, and in the other the "good guys" (his words) win out. I always used to be intrigued by this as it used to be a fairly rare thing. Nowadays in the world of "Filmmaking-by-Committee" it happens all the time and there seems to be an alternate ending on two of every three DVDs released. But 40 years ago, that was strange. I always wondered why they had shot two endings. The more positive side of me hopes it was filmmakers ready to explore the tragic endings they'd been denied for decades prior to this, but unable to fully commit, they went ahead and shot a second option. The more negative side wonders if they used one ending for showings in the North, and one ending for showings in the South. I hope that's not the case, but I don't think it's out of the realm of possibility.
    And here's the really weird part - I have no idea which ending I saw! Maltin lists the running times as 89 min/97 min. He lists the endings in the review as Palance, then "good guys." The DVD I watched ran 89 minutes and change. Now, it was a bargain DVD, and those prints can be chewed up and run any old amount of time, so I wasn't sure I had the downbeat ending, but I thought I probably did. Then the film ended, and I'm not sure...a mix of the good and bad guys died...no one came out particularly happy, but there were survivors... so I don't know? And the movie has not stood the test of time - there's not that much info to be found about it on the internet, and it has apparently fallen into the public domain (or at least has copyright holders who are lax enough to let it be released on several DVD collections from several of the notorious companies who do that sort of thing). I had hoped to read about both endings (or better - see them on YouTube) but my research turned up nothing. The one review on Amazon is from a guy who worked on it in the locations department who hated the movie. *sigh*
    So in the end, it was a very grim drama, but a fairly interesting flick, with a great cast. Peters, Ives, and Palance are all just fine; Carradine and Kwan are strange choices to play Native Americans, but they're both pretty good doing it; and special kudos go to Dane Clark as a forward thinking guy in town who sticks up for Peters at a couple of key moments. Everything else about the movie - including the direction and production values - are solid and workmanlike, not spectacular, but they get the job done. If you don't mind your dramas downbeat and wearing Western clothing, this is a fairly safe bet and it can be found for $1 most places. All others need not apply.


Let's Get Out of Here ?

At around 51:05, Brock Peters reveals he's tired of carting shot-up cattle poisoners around.



Eye Candy ?

She's dressed frontier style, but no amount of dressing down can take away from Nancy Kwan's beauty. Welcome to the list, Ms. Kwan!

Buddha Man's Capsule Review



Buddha Man says "The McMasters is worth watching - and
moreso because it's got two Carradines in it!"


Thanks very much Buddha Man! Til next post you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!

Saturday Night at the Movies! 1/15/11

Who cares what picture we see?



Me, for one, and this one could be on the docket for this evening...

I have enjoyed all three of the Punisher movies, with this one taking top honors, followed by the barely released early 90's version with Dolph Lundgren, and the one in between with Thomas Jane squeaking in to third.

Til next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!

All we ask is that you let us kill you our way....

Drive Thru  (Lionsgate, 2007)

Before the Camera:

Leighton Meester  (TV's Gossip Girl)
Melora Hardin  (TV's The Office)
Nicholas D'Agosto   (TV's Heroes)
Lola Glaudini  (TV's Persons Unknown)
Larry Joe Campbell  (TV's According to Jim)
Van De La Plante  (couple of TV guest spots; first movie)
Penn Badgley  (TV's Gossip Girl)
John Gilbert  (The X-Files computer game)
Sean Whalen  (TV's Unfabulous)
and
Morgan Spurlock  (TV's 30 Days)
as Robbie, the Hella-Burger Manager


Behind the Camera:

Directed by Brendan Cowles and Shane Kuhn

Produced by Matt Milich, Martin Wiley, Chris Sievernich, and 9 other assorted Executive, Associate, and Line Producers

Written by Brendan Cowles and Shane Kuhn


    The opening shot of this flick introduces us to four extremely obnoxious teens cruising about town. They next decide they need to stop for some chow, and pull in at the local "Hellaburger" restaurant. Although the building is dark and the parking lot empty, these dimwits notice nothing and pull up to the drive thru. The clown faced speaker perks right up, but as the order conversation goes on, whoever is behind the clown face makes some strange statements, stuff that sounds threatening. Hmmm. When challenged on this, the voice goes back to standard fast food terminology that rhymes with the earlier threats. Eventually, the two lads in the SUV decide their manhood has been challenged, and they head into the restaurant to kick some tushie.
    However, the joint seems empty, and then a figure pops up who looks like a mashup of the restaurant mascot Horny the clown and one of the members of KISS circa 1982 (ending up looking sort of like a mobile version of the clown faced speaker outside - the mask looks just like the head down to the speaker grid across the mouth) and does them both in messily. The young women out in the SUV, in the meantime, have fallen asleep (!) and are ill prepared for the clown to join them, swinging a large cleaver moments later. Cue credits.
    After a fairly annoying song performed by an onscreen girl band we learn the lead singer is our protagonist Mackenzie (Meester). She is a standard issue horror movie final girl, right down to her retained virginity which is on the table for loss with her boyfriend Fisher (D'Agosto) on the clockstroke of her 18th birthday in a few days. We meet her parents, and are happy to see that mom Marcia is played by Trudi Monk aka Melora Hardin. But then Mackenzie's friends start to meet up with that heavy metalized Horny the Clown and die in weird and gory ways - ways that for the record often have little or nothing to do with fast food, fast food restaurants, fast food mascots, or drive thrus... Mackenzie begins to think that the killer is supernatural in nature (he "appears" where and when needed to spring his attacks) and that he's somehow tied to events in her mom's life.
    Eventually, we do go back to Hellaburger for a cameo by Morgan "Sure I'll be in your anti fast food movie" Spurlock and a fairly cool kill scene that takes place in the kid's play area of the restaurant - with Horny's emergence from the ball crawl a high point of the flick. Then we move on to the home of Hellaburger founder Jack Benjamin (Gilbert) where we learn that mom Marcia was involved in the death of Jack's son Archie (De La Plante), the first person to wear the Horny the Clown mascot outfit and the first and only person to burn to death wearing it in a "cruel prank." Now, "prank gone wrong" scenes almost always hit home with me in movies like this, because it's usually a moment when any filmmaker can push an audience's sympathy buttons, if only for a moment or two and no matter how crappy the surrounding movie might be. However, when they flashback to this one it turns out the event was more stupid than cruel and not particularly pranky, which is too bad - another misstep. But I digress. Now Archie has returned in ghostly form as Horny to kill off the kids of the now grown-ups who killed him. Before you can cough "Nightmare on Elm Street!" into your fist, Horny knocks out Mackenzie and she wakes up in a Hellaburger restaurant, tied up and surrounded by the corpses of her friends, which causes us to cough "Happy Birthday to Me!" into our fists just in time for the fiery finale of the flick.

A tiny Horny was hiding in their bag of Skittles the whole time.

    I will tell anyone who listens that clowns are creepy, so I had medium high hopes for this one, also anticipating the shtick of a killer in a fast food restaurant. So, as the film wandered far afield from its title and concept after the opening 15 minutes or so, I found the movie heading toward Misfire Lane. It never fully recovered from driving down that road, but there were still some solid moments along the way. Breaking down the ingredients- on the plus side: the tongue in cheek tone; the silliness of a fast food concept of a devil clown with tiny horns - hence the name Horny - for a fast food joint known for its spicy food; the always welcome Hardin; Spurlock, genuinely amusing in his three minutes onscreen; and a couple of good gory deaths mixing practical makeup effects with not-as-successful CGI. On the downside: 1) I wasn't much on Horny's mask or spiked boots or other heavy metal trappings; 2) making a lot of the characters obnoxious (especially the quartet in the opening scene) so the viewer wants to see them die - it's okay to let me feel bad for the characters who meet their ends - if the humorous touches are funny, I'll still find them amusing even if I liked the dead character; 3) borrowing a little too liberally and literally from A Nightmare on Elm Street and Happy Birthday to Me; and most of all - 4) after the filmmakers provide a satisfying end to the supernatural killer - which is great because it allows this movie to end well and still leaves the door open for a sequel because it's so easy to bring back a supernatural killer with a minimum of fuss for a sequel - they can't let it go and first go for a tacked on last few minutes with an ill-advised and ill-explained cliffhanger, then a final scene that basically negates the ending and picks up the story again, meaning the movie stops instead of ends. Feh. (And the sequel has wrapped production) So in the end, no recommendations for this one except to Melora Hardin or Morgan Spurlock completists.



Let's Get Out of Here ?

At 51:49 Nicholas D'Agosto uses The Line to indicate he has spent enough time in the police station, and at 1:09:33 he throws it out again, this time tied to an F-Bomb for extra impact. Or not.






Eye Candy ?

The filmmakers would probably think I'd choose one of their teen-ish ladies, but no, the clear winner here is Melora Hardin, a hottie every day and twice on Sunday. Welcome to the list, Ms. Hardin!

Buddha Man's Capsule Review



Buddha Man says "Drive Thru...bup bup bup bup ba...not lovin' it!"

 As always, BM says in 10 words what I take 1000 to say...sterling work, Buddha Man! And oh yeah, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!

Escape from the Planet of the Buddha Man!

Buddha Man returns! And no Baby Milo!





Happy to be back.


The Tingler  (Columbia Pictures, 1959)  Vincent Price stars in his second William Castle movie, and as usual, the flick is a fun little thriller. Vinnie plays Dr. Warren Chapin, a dedicated researcher with an earnest young assistant (Darryl Hickman - Sharky's Machine), a venomous wife, and a really wild line of research - what is it that snaps peoples spines when they die of fright? Eventually, he discovers that all of the pent up fright energy in the body causes a microscopic creature he calls the Tingler that resides in everyone's spinal area to grow uncontrollably in proportion to the level of fear, and the nasty wormlike creature eventually grows large enough to use its pincers to crumple up your backbone like a matchstick.


 Man, that is one ugly necktie Vincent Price is wearing!

 The only way to escape the Tingler is to SCREAM - as that releases the energy that the creature is gowing off of and shrinks it back to miscroscopic size. This crazy bit of sci-fi is then blended into an even more eclectic plot involving the evil Mrs Chapin; a nebbishy little man who owns a movie theater with his deaf mute wife; and several scary sequences that don't make a lick of sense but are cool as heck to watch. Castle's gimmick for this flick was to have the action come to its climax in that movie theater, so he could have the film you're watching "break" and Vincent Price's voice hammer at you from the darkened theater to "Scream! Scream for your lives!" To insure you might want to go along with the idea, several seats in the theater were wired up to "tingle" the viewer's backside as though the worm monster was working on their spine! Incredible! The other really cool sequence in the black and white movie involves a bathtub full of blood - look at this shot from the scene:


Mrs. Gray was very angry that little Timmy was playing with
his lava lamp in the bathtub again.

 Is that just awesome or what? This may be less of a family flick than some of the other Castle movies, what with bathtubs full of blood, axe murderers, and a big scary worm crawling around, but it is a jammin' little flick, highly recommended to those so inclined! Check this one out!

Not so happy now.

Crazy Girls Undercover  (Monarch Home Video, 2008) I picked this up in a grocery store (!) selling off used DVDs for $2 a pop. Looking this one over, I see it's about a spy who runs a topless revue in Las Vegas and calls on his strippers to run spy missions with him. As you can see, I had to have this. Sadly, the execution is not up to the proposal. The story opens with "Damon Archer" (Clive Robertson - who seems genetically engineered to audition for James Bond - but never quite make it and instead play 007 knockoffs until he gets old enough to start playing James Bond villain knockoffs) finishing his last mission as the greatest spy/commando who ever lived. What does he do with his retirement? Skip ahead five years and he's the owner of the Crazy Girls Revue in the Riviera Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas Nevada. (That is a real show, by the way - making this my first movie based on a stage show - not a play or a musical - but a stage show. Wow.) But he's thinking about coming out of retirement. If only he could assemble an elite squad of spy commandos to work for him. Say, look at all those top heavy exotic dancers totttering around on insanely high heels who are already on his payroll...
    Skip ahead another year (I started to hope the whole movie would be like this, skipping ahead 1-5 years every three minutes until the finale, which would have involved a terrorist attack on the retirement community they had all moved to at the hour mark.) Anyhoo, skip ahead another year and now the Crazy Girl ladies are seasoned operatives, able to fulfill any mission that involves skintight black jumpsuits and insanely high heels. Then, all of a sudden, a whole lot of plot kicks in, including (in no particular order) Damon grieves for his family, killed by some bad guy; his right hand woman Casey (Nikki Ziering - one of the last Barker's Beauties on The Price is Right) loves Archer from afar but totally understands he can't return her love due to grieving for his family, who were killed by some bad guy; Archer's boss (Al Sapienza - The Sopranos) tries to send him on another mission, but Archer points out he's retired - retired because he's grieving due to the fact that his family was killed by some bad guy and thus he can't return Casey's love, which forced him to retire - then he goes on the mission unsanctioned with the Crazy Girls anyway; they run into blonde honey Monica (Simona Fusco) who is sad, which matches Archer's mood because he's been grieving over his dead family who were killed by some bad guy, so they promptly form the two-backed-beast, much to Casey's consternation; and then Archer finds out the bad guy they're after turns out to have killed some operative's family...

That's how you sneak up on a motorized convoy -
with BRIGHT YELLOW VEHICLES...

When I scooped this up I really thought it looked like and hoped it would be the spiritual successor to the Andy Sidaris movies of the 80's and 90's (Hard Ticket to Hawaii, Malibu Express, Savage Beach, Do or Die, etc); completely tongue in cheek action flicks with scads of T+A, cheesy action, silly humor, and actors like Erik Estrada and Pat Morita. Ever since Andy went to that Great ABC Sports Control Booth in the sky, there haven't been many movies in that elite subgenre. So to find a new filmmaker ready to step in and cinematically scratch that itch was very exciting.

    I'm still itching.

    It turns out this movie was written by the aging producer of the real Crazy Girls revue, Norbert Aleman. And while the movie's production is not bad - with some decent action and stunts, it is the script that does the movie in. Despite every aspect of the movie pointing to it being a jaunty romp with a saucy wink to the camera on a regular basis - scenes that fade out to comic book panels; the production design, the costuming; etc; the script takes it all deadly seriously. It hits every single plot point you expect it to, breaking no new ground from any action movie made in the last thirty years, and reveals each one of those plot points as though it's never been done before. And asking these actors to play dramatic scenes about loss and love instead of dropping them repeatedly into a hot tub holding an impossibly large martini is just cruel. There's also not that much nudity, with more see through costumes in the Crazy Girl revue scenes (of which there are several) than actual bare flesh. While we're on the subject of those revue scenes - why is the audience in one of them filled with the female impersonators from the La Cage Aux Folles show, in costume? While we ponder that one, I'll wrap this one up - Crazy Girls Undercover is one highly skippable action flick that could have been a silly little gem if only they could have realized just what they were really making and who their target audience was.

Why did I return?

Kong Island  (Monarch Releasing Corporation, 1977)  Shot in 1968 as Eve the Wild Woman in Italy, this bungle in the jungle was brought to America in the wake of Dino de Laurentiis's King Kong (1976) and slapped with a wonderfully misleading title. To wit - there is no King Kong in this movie; and it does not take place on an island. Brad Harris (a longtime muscleman actor in Italian flicks about Hercules, Samson and Goliath) is one of those standard issue mercenary/thief types doublecrossed in the opening scene by partner Marc Lawrence (two time Bond cast member - Diamonds are Forever and The Man with the Golden Gun.) The first two things we notice is that Lawrence is playing a stinker as he so often did, and that much to our chagrin, he is completely dubbed here, with some generic middle aged voice covering up his golden throated mutterings. One demerit and counting. Some time later, Harris is hired to do something that involves walking for a long time through the jungle. Two demerits and counting. Along the way, the expedition is attacked by gorillas (!) bearing surgical scars (!!) and one of the women is carted off. Harris takes his time getting back to civilization, (Third and final demerit) but eventually mounts another expedition and sets out to rescue her. He eventually discovers there's a mad scientist deep in the jungle who is implanting mind control gear into gorillas with the intent to eventually do the same to every man and woman on Earth and control the world! (I don't think we have much to worry about - he's still beta testing on the apes, and the surgery takes him several hours - he's no spring chicken, so he'd never live long enough to perform the operation several billion more times...) But I digress. When Harris arrives, he is the only one surprised to find out the mad scientist is none other than... Marc Lawrence! He not only robs payroll trucks and shoots his partners, he's also a mad scientist! Wow! Then for some reason there's a lot more plot with more doublecrosses, more skullduggery, and lots more jungle stock footage thrown in, and eventually the movie ends. Whew.


Marc Lawrence wishes he'd remembered to pack his voicebox
for the trip to Italy...

This is one of those movies I marvel at - where a completely unscrupulous producer gets ahold of some junky movie, slaps a title on it that plays off some other more famous movie, then cashes in on the people who fall for the deception. (And you thought those folks over at The Asylum were the first to do this!) I just wonder what parent got dragged to this after Junior begged to see that "new King Kong movie" because he enjoyed Dino's so much; or who might have been at the local drive-in, not watching this at all if he or she was lucky... In any case, if Lawrence's voice was intact, this might have warranted a tiny recommendation because he's pretty cool, but the dub job puts the final nail in this cinematic coffin. Skip it.


See you soon, and always remember, the government of Alaska will pay you to live there.

Saturday Night At The Movies! 1/8/11

Who cares what picture we see?


I do, actually! And if we'd been hanging out tonight, we could have watched this movie:

Here's the poster for this epic:

I like how even then Hollywood was ageist enough to feature the stars' names on the poster, but not let their "seasoned" faces be seen...



And don't worry - even though 66% of the blog in 2011 have been movie trailer posts so far - they're not taking over - I just wanted to introduce the new department and see if we can make it weekly for the rest of the year...

Til next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!

Yeah, I'll bet the first aid kits in Hell are a little scarce...

Hell's Bloody Devils  (Independent International Pictures, 1970)

Before the Camera:

Broderick Crawford  (TV's Highway Patrol)

Scott Brady  (Gremlins)
Kent Taylor  (Brain of Blood)
John Gabriel  (he was the original Professor in the first Gilligan's Island pilot!)
Keith Andes  (...And Justice For All)
Jack Starrett  (First Blood)
Erin O'Donnell  (Saintly Sinners)
Robert Dix  (Live and Let Die)
Vicki Volante  (Blood of Dracula's Castle)
John Carradine  (Peggy Sue Got Married)
Anne Randall  (Westworld)
William Bonner  (Orgy of the Dead)
Emily Banks  (Gunfight in Abilene)
and
Colonel Harland Sanders as himself (!)

And look fast for:

Greydon Clark  (director - Without Warning '80)
and
John 'Bud' Cardos (director - Kingdom of the Spiders)


Behind the Camera:

Directed by Al Adamson

Produced by Al Adamson, Rex Carlton, Jerry Evans, Fred Gebhardt and Robert Kinoshita

Written by Jerry Evans



    The very first thing I'm going to say in this review is meant to really kind of weird you out - get this - Broderick Crawford, the aging top billed star in this movie - once hosted Saturday Night Live! Which means this movie has a direct connection to MacGruber. Weird, right?
    But I digress.
    What we have here is a typical Al Adamson movie - starting out as one movie and ending up as something fairly different. Here Al started a crime thriller in 1967 called Operation M which would have been a Bond knockoff (as so many movies were in 1967), right down to the credit sequence and John Barry-esque title tune from Nelson Riddle. But as often happened with Al's movies, the money ran out before the movie was finished. (And legend has it that the original executive producer Rex Carlton committed suicide right around that time due to a large debt owed to the mob...makes you wonder...). Three years later biker movies were a hot genre, so Al grabbed up this footage, added some bikers to the already convoluted story and voila! Hell's Bloody Devils! And never one to waste money, they kept the 007-y titles and theme song, altered just enough to make them fit the new version of the movie.
    There's an awful lot of plot to lay out if I go all linear and tell it step by step - let's see how much I can boil it down - FBI spy guy Mark Adams (Gabriel) is after nazi supercriminal Count von Delberg (Taylor), who has teamed up with the mob in a counterfeit money caper.  Adams goes undercover in the mob to get close to von Delberg's clique. In addition to his mob dealings, the Count also has a biker gang at his beck and call and sends them out on various nefarious missions. During his time undercover, Adams manages to schmooze with both von Delberg's daughter (O'Donnell) and an Israeli agent (Volante) also after the Count; hang out with FBI honey Banks;  drop in at a pet shop run by John Carradine (?); get hit on by a 16 year old (played by 20-something Randall); duke it out with Jack Starrett (the nasty cop who wants to shave Rambo... dry in First Blood); and go to Kentucky Fried Chicken and meet Colonel Sanders (!). More plot and some action ensues and it all comes down to a thrilling climax in a burning shack with a extraordinarily big basement, which is the Al Adamson version of a Bond villain lair.

"Tastes like chicken, eh? Why no, young lady, never heard
that one before!"

You have to experience an Al Adamson movie to truly understand it. The stories pretty much never make any sense, you just have to let them flow over you and try not to drown in them. This particular effort was considered lost for many years, but thankfully it was found. It's not the equal of Dracula vs Frankenstein (my favorite Adamson movie - mashing three unfinished movies together for some bewildering cinema) but this one is pretty good. (Remember the yardstick we're measuring 'good' with - the Al Adamson yardstick!) Everybody is fun acting in their movie (whichever one they were hired for) with William Bonner and Vicki Volante the big links as they appear in both sets of footage (with Volante's ever changing hairstyle a clue to the passage of time between shoots for her). The old pros add some screen value, and thank goodness Al worked out a crew catering deal with KFC in return for an onscreen commercial starring the real Colonel Sanders as it is the most blissfully surreal moment in a movie that doesn't lack for weirdness. If you'd like to see how to cobble a finished movie out of a pile of unfinished film footage with spit and baling wire - then I definitely recommend this to you. If you insist on having movies made all at once and making sense - move along. There's nothing for you to see here.



 
Let's Get Out of Here ?
 
At around 1:31, John Gabriel knows it's a wrap.
 
 

 
Eye Candy ?

We got our first two-fer as both Emily Banks and Anne Randall make the list in the 60's hottie glory! Welcome aboard ladies!



Emily Banks





Anne Randall



 

Buddha Man's Capsule Review



Buddha Man says: "Hell's Bloody Devils is a safe bet for
those who don't mind a little scotch tape on their movies."

 Thanks Buddha Man, and til next time, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Let's start 2011 off right with the trailer for one of the greatest New Year's movies ever made! And by greatest I mean worst! I like how the trailer even lies - making out like the movie takes place across several New Year's Eves instead of the real story: it all takes place in one night with the killer touting a death at midnight in every time zone in the US... guess that was too complicated to try to explain in 104 seconds. Enjoy!


Til next post, you Can Poke Me With A Fork, Cause I Am Outta Here!